PRE-ORDER These Days You Get Arrested & Thrown In Jail If You Say You're English scarf

THIS IS FOR PRE-ORDER. PRODUCTION WILL BE ABOUT 4-5 WEEKS.

Get ready for the delayed Euro 2020 feast of football AND signal your own paranoid delusionary sense of victimhood with this beautiful scarf.

White on one side, red on the other, this neck-wrapping garment features not only one of the Three Lions cruelly handcuffed by the United Kingdom's anti-English, dinner party munching, liberal, celtic, Londoncentric metropolitan elite that you have hallucinated into existence, but also the Monopoly board policeman sending you to the prison cell where, in your fevered imagination, you are set to spend the rest of your miserable life.

This fashionable piece is intended purely as a novelty item for use within the privacy of your own home and/or modest buy-to-let property portfolio. Bastardo Sports takes absolutely no responsibility for any arrests, savage beatings, mockery, Tango advert reenactments, confused stares or offers of a national newspaper column the purchaser suffers in the event of them venturing outside.

As featured on Streatham Rovers FC's controversial 2020 Christmas card.